I’ve been a prisoner of war—trapped, beaten down, and chained by offense. I spent years staring at life from the outside, watching everyone else laugh, love, and move on while I stayed locked up in bitterness. Offense didn’t just wound me—it owned me. It rewrote my story, stole my peace, and turned me into someone I didn’t even recognize.

Here’s what the enemy doesn’t want you to know: the cage isn’t locked. It never was. But the trap doesn’t need a lock when you’re too busy clutching your anger to even try walking out.

The Enemy’s Trap

Offense is the enemy’s weapon of choice. It sneaks in through betrayal, rejection, or a careless word, then whispers, “You deserve to feel this way. Stay angry.” The Bible calls offense a scandalon—a trigger for a trap. It’s bait designed to lure you in with the promise of justice, but all it delivers is poison.

I believed the lie. I thought I was protecting myself by holding onto the hurt. But offense doesn’t shield you—it chains you. I spent years replaying old battles, rehearsing the pain like it was some twisted survival tactic.

You start thinking, “What they did defines me. What they said about me is who I am.” But here’s the truth: The way people treat you says more about them than you—but the way you let it affect you says everything about you. That’s where the real fight begins—not with their actions, but with your response.

A Prisoner of War Mentality

Living in offense is like being a prisoner of war. Life happens around you, but you’re stuck in the past—reliving old wounds, waiting for justice that never comes.

I told myself I had every right to be angry, every right to carry the pain. But pride doesn’t protect—it isolates. It makes you feel like you’re the only one who’s ever been hurt, like holding onto the grudge is the only way to keep the pain from owning you.

“The war isn’t out there—it’s in here.” And as long as you carry offense, the enemy doesn’t even have to fight you. He already owns you.

Whosoever: The Key to the Cage

John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” That word whosoever changes everything. It means you’ve got a choice—you’re a free moral agent to decide which side of the fence that you’re on. You don’t have to stay stuck in bitterness—you can walk out of the cage at any time.

For years, I thought I was waiting on someone to apologize, to make things right. But freedom doesn’t come from what they do. Freedom comes from what you decide. The only thing stopping me from being free was me.

“Offense feels like a shield, but it’s really a noose.” And the tighter you hold onto it, the more it chokes the life out of you.

Pride is the Chain

Offense doesn’t start with what they did—it starts with how you hold onto it. Pride chains you to the offense. It tells you, “They owe me. I can’t forgive until they fix it.” But pride doesn’t just keep you stuck—it keeps you fighting battles that were over years ago.

Jesus said in Matthew 23:12, “And whosoever shall exalt himself shall be abased; and he that shall humble himself shall be exalted.” Humility doesn’t mean pretending the hurt didn’t happen. It means saying, “I’m done letting this define me.” It’s not about minimizing the pain—it’s about refusing to let it have the final word.

“Humility doesn’t erase the pain—it breaks its hold over you.” The moment you let humility in, pride loses its grip. Humility doesn’t just break the chain—it hands the offense over to God, the only one who can truly carry it.

Forgiveness: Your Escape Route

“Forgiveness isn’t weakness—it’s war.” It’s the boldest move you’ll ever make against the enemy. It’s saying, “You can’t own me anymore.”

When Jesus hung on the cross, He had every reason to take offense. He’d been abandoned, mocked, and betrayed by the people He came to save. Yet, He said, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). He didn’t forgive because they deserved it. He forgave because offense is a thief, and forgiveness is the only way to take back what’s been stolen.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you forget what happened. It doesn’t mean you’re inviting them back into your life. “Forgiveness isn’t letting them off the hook—it’s cutting the rope that’s been tying you to them.” You can’t move forward while you’re chained to the past.

Breaking Free

The longer you hold onto offense, the more it takes from you. It doesn’t just rob you of peace—it steals your joy, your relationships, and your purpose. For years, I believed freedom was something other people got to have. But freedom isn’t something you wait for—it’s something you take.

“The prison door is open. It’s been open this whole time.” But the enemy doesn’t need to lock it—he just needs to convince you that you don’t belong outside of it. The only question is: are you ready to walk out?

Final Call to Action:

The war isn’t over until you decide it’s over. Stop giving the enemy control over your peace and joy. Humble yourself. Forgive. Walk out of the prison you’ve been living in.

This is your moment. Don’t let offense steal another day. The door is open, and your freedom is waiting. All that’s left is for you to take the first step.

“You can stay a prisoner of war, or you can choose to be free. But you can’t be both.”

Over It: Offense Doesn’t Own You – Coming February 2025

If this article hit home, then you need to read Over It: Offense Doesn’t Own You, my upcoming book releasing in February 2025. This isn’t just another book about forgiveness—it’s my raw, personal journey of overcoming hurt, pain, and the kind of offense I never thought I could escape.

I’ll take you behind the scenes of my life—moments where the people who hurt me the most were the ones I swore I could never forgive. I never imagined I’d have a relationship with them again, let alone a restored one. But God did what I couldn’t. He didn’t just heal my heart—He healed the relationships I thought were beyond saving.

In Over It, I’ll show you how to:

• Break free from the bitterness and pain holding you back.

• Let go of offense, even when it feels impossible.

• Experience the kind of restoration that only God can bring.

This book isn’t just my story—it’s a battle plan for yours. It’s time to stop letting offense write your story. Freedom is possible. Restoration is possible. And you don’t have to walk this road alone.

Mark your calendar for February 2025. Let’s walk into freedom together. Follow me at [your website or social media links] for updates and sneak peeks!

—Joshua L Mullins